The Serene Empire of Evolia is a massive, feral nation, notable for its huge mushroom trampolines and tame mastadons which frolic freely in the ancient mahogany forests.

The sweet, insane population of manythousand fluid grouplets are free to do what they like, howsoever they please, governed by nothing more than a subtle sense of obviousness which wells up from bellyminds run rapturously asunder in a monstrous range of impromptu rituals, thundering swing jams and near constant love-making. Evolians are noted for their extraordinary sensitivity to pain, and willingness to obey its tiniest intelligent twinges, the extraordinary complexity and subtlety of their facial muscles, the musicality of their speech, their gullibility, fecundity and ludicrous insouciance.

Evolian architecture partly imitates natural forms, the rest is alive; the inhabitants having learnt how to persuade their staggering flora to cooperate in civic construction. More temporary dwellings are common, mud is loved, and all children can bivvy.

Emblem: Vast, pulsating electric jellyfishgod which periodically rises above the clouds, lashing out its firey white limbs, pinning Evolians, howling with delight, to the sky.

Government: Liquid anarcho-monarchy. Leaders who give orders, mark out property or seek privilege are handed over to the care of young children until the yibber-yabber has left them.

The capital of Evolia is Shlaarg Makwang-Hoosh Fe-Tarp! and its currency is the Romantic Gesture.

Languages: Djang-djang, Zala, Chess, Riddim and the Immortal Music of Vibe.

Education: None. Economy: None. Politics: None. Law: None. Crime: None.


Needless to say, a detailed account of the fractal structure, human technology, paradoxical ethics and mind-blowing aesthetics of Evolia — occasionally known as Utopia — can be found in The Apocalypaedia. Some of the more common self-shattering sex-practices of Evolians are detailed in the brakes-off Belly Up! sex guide.